Love Affair

I love cheese. Always have, so much so that when I was in 4th grade, I only asked for cheese for my birthday. Mozzerella, provelone, cheddar, Muenster - you name it! You'd be hard pressed to find a cheese I don't like (unless it's pepper jack... or that bacon horseradish nonsense. You don't mess with perfection, people!) I like to look at cheese as my longest standing relationship, always there when I need it no matter what time of night or how I want it. It's wrapped so many of the foods I love in it's warm, ooey-gooey embrace. It's never let me down.

Until this year.

I've never been one to drink a glass of milk just because it's milk. If it's laden with chocolate syrup or served alongside chocolate chip cookies, that's a different story entirely. Straight up milk has never sat well with me anyway, which was to be expected. My mother gave me many of her good qualities - her dairy intolerance was not one of those. I could still enjoy treats like ice cream, yogurt, and of course cheese with the use of a daily probiotic. Who cares about a little moo juice at that point, amiright?

Shortly before my 24th birthday, I began to notice intense cramping after visiting with my two main men - Ben and Jerry - on multiple occasions. Then, yogurt became hard to handle, making morning parfaits less exciting and mornings at the office awkward. A few months ago, I made a batch of homemade "poor man's" mac n cheese. Noodles, butter, cheese, all in the microwave until it's swimming in a delectable hot mess. I sat down with my bowl of deliciousness and destroyed it in under 5 minutes flat while watching Law&Order SVU. Ten minutes later... well, lets just say it looked like a crime scene in my bathroom when I was through.

I blamed it on the flu. I blamed it on microwave rays making my food temporarily radioactive. I blamed it on everything but my sweet friend, Mr. Cheese. Unfortunately, the next few times I ate something cheesy and the same thing happened, I could no longer deny the truth. My beloved had betrayed me.

It wasn't until I began LisaRenee's detox progam through Your Fountain of Health (https://www.facebook.com/fountainofhealthforplanthappypeople) that I really started to take a look at this long-standing relationship. The first four days of the "transition" period I worked at cutting back on cheese, along with grains, refined sugars and coffee, none of which are allowed. As Detox Day loomed on the horizon, my fiance and I made turkey burgers with brussel sprouts, red potato fries and loads of CHEESE DRIPPING ALL OVER THE PLACE OH MY GOD IT'S GLORIOUS. It was incredibly delicious, and resulted in some of the worst stomach pain I've ever experenced well into the night. The next day I started the actual detox with gusto, the memory of all the pain, exhaustion, and irritability of losing a night's sleep to stomach issues fueling me on.

If you've never heard of LisaRenee and her Fountain of Health, get acquainted and get in touch with her. It is incredible the transformation I've seen in myself and it hasn't even been a week yet. She provdes participants with all the keys to success - meal plans, shopping lists, daily email and/or Facebook support, information and education - the list goes on and on. I am so thankful to have been given the opportunity to participate in this program and will be singing it's praises as long as I can croon a tune. I can't wait to see where I am on the 27th when we wrap up, but based on my progress so far I know it will be a much better place than where I started. I know I will have learned even more about myself and my body by the end of this thing, but if I were to end it today, I can already take away so much it's astounding. I know I will be closer to my weight loss goal, which is exciting. And I am certain that these lessons, recipes, and feelings of self-confidence and pride are something that I will never forget.

But where does that leave me in my tryst with Mr. Cheese? It leaves me re-evaluating our affair for sure, and although I don't think I could ever fully leave him, I will be keeping a little more distance between us. He's proven he cannot be trusted to treat my body the way it deserves.

Maybe Mr. Kale needs a new main squeeze?